Where’s the fast forward button

Ever get a new remote and stare at the buttons trying to figure out what they are and what they do?  Have you noticed how all these different remotes use other words to describe it’s function?  Like “guide” vs “menu” … stuff like that.

I feel like I’m looking at a new remote trying to figure out which button to press.   I sit here with a heaviness in my being.   I don’t know what I’m supposed to do; don’t know where I’m supposed go; don’t know why I feel so lost today.  As I type, it feels like my arms are stuck in mud and my fingers barely move to hit the keys.

I’ve received unpleasant mail, yesterday.  It wasn’t surprising, but it was still frustrating.   I know I’m not the only one in this world that faces this type of mail, especially in this economy, but when one gets something like this in the mail, it makes one feel like such a dead beat loser.  I know in my heart that I’m not and I also know my Father doesn’t look at me as this type of a person.  But the enemy of my soul wants to beat me down and make me feel useless until I’m in such despair that walking into his darkness is so much easier than turning to the light and arms of my God.

I searched my bible and was brought to this:   Luke 12: 6-7 Commentary in my Life Recovery Bible says, “If God cares for even the smalles sparrow, then he cares even more for us.  If he cares enough to count the hairs on our head, then he cares even more about our thoughts and feelings.  Dwelling on this reality can help us when we feel depressed or lonely.  The most powerful and important person in the universe cares deeply and personally about us.”

Now these songs are playing on the radio. 

Thank you, Lord, for reminding me who I am.


7 thoughts on “Where’s the fast forward button

  1. I’ve changed the first video … same song, but the video shows the spiritual warfare going on. It seemed to fit better with what is going on in my being.

  2. I really don’t think you are dead, have been beaten, or are a loser. GH is right, a lot of people are feeling this way now a days. Things will improve, we just need faith, something I know you have.

  3. No way you are a loser. You are entirely too much to talk to. 🙂

    Still I agree, I have days like that too. That’s usually when I get in my jammies and watch Emma or Pride and Prejudice.

  4. MM – aaww, thanks! I’m ready for a non-thinking day, just to let these past few days sink in. If I get what I need to get done, maybe I’ll do that tomorrow.

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