How do you handle resentment?

Is there a way to deal with ones feelings so it doesn’t turn into resentment or worse hate? 

My husband is dealing with several issues; work, health, insurance, etc.  One of his employees retired and he was not allowed to post her job position because they wanted to save money (so he was told by his director).  Therefore, he’s had to work her job as well as do his managerial duties.    In other words, to keep from paying a new person’s wage, on-call money, overtime and benefits, they would rather he work 12-14 hours, 4 days a week and one 8-10 hour day, which constitutes his work week.  Since he is considered management, they do not have to pay him overtime etc.  

The director won’t let any of his managers make decisions, however, on their review they are gigged for not making decisions … tell me, are all directors this way?

The director has admitted he’s a workaholic and expects everyone else to be one also.  However, he is always out of town and never in his office.  Oh and this is another thing that got me … the director said that his wife was his hobby!  I think if I was his wife, I’d hit him with the frying pan!

Anyway, back to the story, he was told that they had to wait a short while before they could post the job opening.   I think it was a 60 day time frame … well, 60 days have come and gone and when my husband asks, he’s told not yet.  (Again, I’m not sure if this is from his director or from the higher ups.) 

So, today, it was mentioned about posting the job vacancy and the director told him he could post it along time ago and that he had told my husband.  If that were the case, my husband would have jumped on it right away, since most of his time is spent doing the other person’s job and not what he is paid to do.  My husband told his boss that he had not given him the okay yet, and that he has been waiting for approval.  I’m starting to think the director needs to pull his head out of his rear!   So this is just a glimpse of what he goes through with his boss.

Now for his employees:  The one that retired was not liked by all.  She’d been there way too long and was too set in her ways.  The one that worked with the retired employee also has been there way too long and worked the same days as the retired one.  The other one has been there awhile and constantly complains about everyone.  She doesn’t have a nice thing to say about anyone, unless they are stroking her ego!  The 3rd employee is new, however, is being groomed to take over the retired one’s position.  She works the same days as the complainer and unfortunately, negativity breeds negativity, and there you have it, they constantly complain about the one left behind.   Of course, this poor person isn’t the only one they complain about, they complain to the director about my husband.   Because they do not feel he’s paid his dues yet!  It’s a dang good thing he is a kinder and gentler person now, because if this was several years ago, he would have ripped their head off and … well, you know the rest.  I actually feel he’s become a little too kinder and gentler for these women.   

He actually is a much better person than I … of course, having worked with women most of my life, I’ve learned how to put them in their place.  Which gave me the lovely label of “Cast Iron B****”  Yes, I used to make receptionists tremble when they would give me a call.  I must admit, it did give me quite a bit of satisfaction in the stressful job I was in. 

Anyway, because I am the wife, I am quite protective.  I have so much resentment for his boss and his employees that I just want to rip their faces off!!  Now you have a glimpse of my old self.   So, my question to you is, how do you handle resentment?

Being a Christian, one is not supposed to harbor resentment or hatred in their heart.  I am asking Him for His guidance and to change my heart toward these people.  It is easy for me to let it build and fester until the boil explodes, however, I choose to ask the Lord for His grace and mercy so I can forgive and forget.  I know to some of you, forgiving is not an option or an easy thing to do.  And just because I am a Christian doesn’t mean I am exempt from having bad thoughts, words and actions, it just means I have to surrender to Him, because I cannot forgive and forget without His Grace and Mercy. 

So in the middle of my struggle with this resentment and hatred, I call on Jesus to help me through it.  The worldly one would love nothing better than to keep festering the boil of resentment and hatred, but the One who is called “I Am” will remove it completely. 

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2 thoughts on “How do you handle resentment?

  1. Great post! I remember those days of office politics – not fun.

    I have to keep asking God to remind me that I need to show people His grace even when I want to have them arrested for calling 911 for stupid, dimwitted things. Sometimes it is impossible for me to keep my irritation out of my voice but I take a break, find a quiet place and talk to God. It always helps. 🙂

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