3 days

I can’t believe how fast the time has flown.  Here I am, 3 days away from getting on  a plane to Nebraska.  I am excited and exhausted at the same time.

I need to pack, but I’ m ready for bed at 3:30pm.  So many things to get done, now to get the body to work!

Anyway, stopped in to say, “Hey!”  I’m not sure when I’ll be online again.   Y’all have a great rest of the weekend!

The First Day of February

Disclaimer – I’m not responsible for any typos or non complete sentences as I’m blogging under the influence.  

The progression of my disease keeps  me in pain.  I’ve had to back out of a couple of meetings due to my body not cooperating with the morning.  I miss Toastmasters and Women of Grace, because I’m doing good just getting to work before the doors open.

I’m now walking with a cane.  I don’t know why I hadn’t done this before as it takes the weight off my knee, so hopefully it won’t be as painful AND I need to stop being stubborn and just use the darn thing!  The cool thing about this cane – it was my brother’s.  Hubby cut it down for me.  I’m still getting used to being in sync with walking and steps, but I’m getting there.  I still cannot go up a flight of stairs.

In March we are traveling to Nebraska to meet our new granddaughter.  Then after that we will be going to Vegas to visit family.  I’ve been debating on taking advantage of the wheelchair offered at the airport.  I probably should use the wheelchair that way I won’t end up over exerting myself and be down for a day or two of my 1 week vacation at each destination.

I left work early yesterday as my knees decided to rebel and the pain was affecting my thoughts.  I couldn’t stay focused with the throbbing.  Hubby picked me up and brought me home.  He surprised me with the cane, as it had been a couple of weeks that he said he was going to cut it down.

I think my knees finally had enough as it had been an active week at work.  The constant walking/moving/up and down out of the chair was enough that they finally decided to quit working.  My right knee wouldn’t bend without shooting pains.  I get aggravated but there isn’t much I can do.  Well, I could start taking a mild form a chemo drug (in addition to the other ones) to see if it will work on the pain, but I’m still being resistant to this option.

I have applied for a handicap placard so we can park closer wherever we go.  I’m hoping to have it before we leave for Nebraska at the end of this month.

I’m excited to travel and see my kids/grandkids but apprehensive as I’m not as mobile as I was the last time I saw them.  Heck I’m not as mobile as I was last March.  Strange how fast this disease is progressing and affecting me.  I’m thankful hubby is going with us as I know I would not be able to travel without him.  I know he gets frustrated being my caretaker, but he really is there for me.

We’ve talked to my doctor about disability.  As it takes so long I guess I really should look into it.  If I continue to progress as fast as I have these last 7 months, what will the next 7 months look like?

The 30th was one of our pastor’s birthdays.  Actually the one I have a good working relationship with.  I made him the Better Than Sex Cake (that’s what it’s called) or as my brother-in-law calls it, “The Chocolate Death Cake”!  LOL, I was glad to hear he really liked it.

Sunday is the Super Bowl.  Which team are you rooting  for?  As my Steelers and  hubby’s Vikings are not there, I don’t have  a  preference.  I saw a preview of the puppy and the horse commercial (of course it was Budwiser) so I may be watching for the commercials AND to see Bruno Mars.  Other than that, I don’t have much interested in the game.  Personally, I think the Broncos will dominate the game.  But kudos to both teams for getting to the Super Bowl!!  How cool is that!?!?!

I’m going back to bed to get these legs up!  As I spend so much time in bed, I may need to get a new mattress or switch the one from the spare room to our room.  I’d really like to get a memory foam mattress and I keep eyeing the ones on Overstock.com … but that will be in time.

Well, y’all have a great weekend.  Talk at you later.

Happy New Year, 4 days late

I started the new year with a bang – sick – again!  I am not amused nor amazed!  Of course, hubby is worst than me.  All I can say is – Not. Again.

I was so happy to say goodbye to 2013.  It was a rough year, starting from the beginning.  I had high hopes that 2014 would be better, that is until we came down sick.  There’s an awful flu going around that can turn into viral pneumonia.  I’m worried that is what the hubs has.   Being viral, well, not much they can do.  He’s been on antibiotics to keep any infection at bay, but his ribs are hurting evrytime he coughs or sneezes.   He does have the strong cough syrup, I may give him another dose so he can sleep.

Looking out my window, the sky is blue and the sun is shining bright.  I have the front door open to let some air in.  I really just want to go out there and wander.  My knees are not letting me do too much wandering these days.  They hurt and I wince, sometimes scream, when I have to move them.  I’m not thrilled that the right knee is getting as bad as the left.

The time is getting closer for the new grand-baby’s arrival.   I can’t wait to meet this little bundle of joy.  Thankfully both mom  & baby are doing well.

Not much else is going on from this side of the computer.   I hope you have a great weekend!

 

Almost Christmas

Christmas is so close.  I know the next couple of days will fly by as we have 5 Christmas Eve services between Monday and Tuesday evening.  Thankfully, we are closed on Christmas AND there are no services next weekend for Volunteer Appreciation Weekend.  It takes many volunteers to put on a service, not to mention an additional 5 Christmas Eve Services.  I’m not sure hubby will know what to do with a weekend off.

I wasn’t going to put up our little tree.  When I walked into the house Friday night, hubby had our little 2 foot tree up.

2013 tree.

He did a great  job.  I guess you can tell what movie I’m watching on the tele – “A Knights Tale”   HAH!

Yesterday, I went with a couple of friends to S4L’s house.  She had a class on Essential Oils.  I’ve  learned quite a bit and look forward to learning more!  Scleroderma has made a mess of my skin (among other things).  After 3 different oils rubbed into my hands and 2 different ones in my water, this morning my skin felt calmer and some of the weird scaly spots are not as bad.  The interesting thing the instructor had mentioned is that most auto-immune diseases are caused by an over abundance of Candida in the body.  What she said made sense and it would definitely be worth checking this out.  As I’m still within the 1st year of this disease, what if this cures it?   I’m all for that!!  I must say that I was exhausted when I got home.  Not sure if it was drinking information from a fire hose or the oils working in my body.  Today, I’m vertical, which is a great thing!

The new medication I started on Friday, can cause facial muscle twitches, seizures and more lovely neurological side effects that I’m not too thrilled about.   Plus another future medication is a mild form of chemo.    I’ll let y’all know the progress as I venture on this new path of Essential Oils

Later today we are going to S4L’s house for a gathering.  It will be fun, as this will be the last time I get to see her and her family before they leave to visit her family in Seattle.  It’s a potluck so I’m going to make Mac & Cheese.  LOL, hopefully it will turn out as I haven’t made it in quite some time.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas!!  Have a great time with you family and friends and hopeful in the perfect gift that was given to us over 2000 years ago!!

Love you all!

 

Is it cold where you are?

I had a last minute dog sitting job.  My friends asked if I’d watch their gentle giant as they were spending the night in Reno.  Of course I said yes, as I just LOVE this dog!!  Poor guy was missing his dad that he would whimper, so I’d hold him until he settled down.  LOL  I love big dogs as I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him!

I usually go to the Parade of Lights.  But last night with the snow on the ground and as cold as it was, I figured I’d stay home with the dog.  I really wanted to take him with me, but I could see myself skiing as he would want to go faster than I can walk.

So we ended up sitting in front of the fire and watched a movie.  Not a bad way to do a Saturday night.  Plus I had stew in the crockpot and it was just what was needed on a cold winter night!!

That’s all from this side of the computer.  How are things on your side?

That’s it

This is about all the decorating I’m doing this year.  Now, it’s difficult to put a tree up and take it down.  So, I don’t think I’ll be doing any decorating.  Which is okay, the kids don’t come around during the holidays, so it’s easier to not even bother.

We are going away for the night of my birthday.  We’re spending the night at South Lake Tahoe and I took the next day off, so we don’t have to hurry back to town.  Now that we are animal free, we can spend the night somewhere and not have to worry about muttley.  The deal includes 2 dinners & 2 breakfasts as well as a room.  This package runs until Dec. 20th, but will pick up again after the 1st of the year.  YAY!

We had a blast at Thanksgiving!  I haven’t laughed so hard or that much in a long long time!  Thanks, S4L for having us over!!!  I was down the next two days, one because I was very tired; the other, because it’s the holidays.  And you know me and the holidays – those dang blues get to rearing their ugly head.  So I spent 2 days in bed watching McMillan and Wife on Netflix.

I’m doing better now – I forced myself out of bed on Sunday to do laundry & dishes.  I knew if I stayed in bed another day, I wouldn’t be able to move come Monday.  When hubby got home, we wandered to the craft fair across the street and bought an ornament for the exchange at the Women’s Bible Study group.  Today I had to fight my knee pain.  When I finally got home, I took a pain pill and started feeling better.

Not much else new – just hanging in.

 

Happy Thanksgiving

The start of the Holiday Season – Turkey Day!

Usually we go to a casino to eat an then make something on Friday in order to have leftovers for the weekend.  Today, we are going to spend the afternoon with friends and I’m excited.  I may even shave my legs for this!  LOL

Enjoy your family and friends!!  There are many things to be thankful, don’t take those things for granted!!

Discouraged

Tonight I was feeling discouraged and loss of hope.  So strong that I was mad, sad, frustrated and felt that I don’t have a purpose.   What is God’s purpose for me?  I’ve wasted my healthy years thinking of me and now that I’m not well, I’m still thinking of me.

How do I proceed to do what God put me on this earth to do without being bogged down with thinking about what I’m going through.  How my body is changing with Scleroderma.  How do I go through the physical changes and not get so discouraged?

While sitting in my pitty party, God smacked me up side the head and told me to look up the verses in the Bible on Discouragement.

There are several that struck me and thanks to hubby’s Life Application Bible, I was able to go through the verses and read the commentaries.

The ones I highlighted in my Bible are:  Deuteronomy 1:22; Deuteronomy 31:8; Joshua 1:9; Joshua 8:1; 1 Chronicles 22:13; 1 Chronicles 28:20; 2 Chronicles 20:15; 2 Chronicles 20:17; Job 4:5; Isaiah 42:4; and Ephesians 3:13.

Over and over I’m reminded Do not be afraid, to be strong and courageous.  Do not be discouraged.

In the commentaries of these verses, one said the only way to lose is to give up.  Giving up is something I think about.  What if I just gave up and stayed in bed all day long every day.  So when I read, “The only way to lose is to give up” – well that got my attention.

Another commentary really hit home as I’ve got some things to face and deal with.  In 1 Chronicles 28:20 it says, “Be strong and courageous and do the work.  Do not be afraid or discouraged for the Lord God is with you.  He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the Lord is finished.”  The commentary of this said to not be frightened of this task.  Fear can immobilize us.  The size of a job, it’s risks or pressure of the situation can cause us to freeze and do nothing.  One remedy of fear is found here; instead, get to work – getting started is often the most difficult and frightening part of a job.  Yes, I’ve been hit by God’s 2 x 4 again.  It’s such a simple solution, but a hard one in the flesh.

The best commentary is about 2 Chronicles 20:15 – We may not fight an enemy army, but every day we battle temptation, pressure & rulers of this dark world, who want us to rebel against God.  Remember as believers, we have God’s Spirit in us.  If we ask God’s help when we face struggles, God will fight for us and God always Triumphs.

I love the list of how to let God fight for us:

  1. By realizing the battle is not ours, but God’s
  2. By recognizing human limitations & allowing God’s strength to work through our fears & weakness.
  3. By making sure we are pursuing God’s interest and not just our own selfish desires.
  4. By asking God for help in our daily battles.

Why do I try to do things in my own strength.  Why do I get discouraged when it says right there that He is with me, fighting for me?

What started out as a very discouraged, no hope evening has turned into a comfort and encouragement from my Heavenly Father.  I can’t wait to attack the next verses on Hope and Illness.