I know, it’s been a long time

The months have flown by and we are now in November.  I have about 1/3 of the house packed and we load the truck on December 6th.  God help me, please!!

As you can tell we are still moving to the Midwest.  This is similar but different from the last times we’ve moved.  Why?  I’m so glad you asked, because I would be in the same amount of completed packing, because I was working full time.  Now it’s due to my body not cooperating with me from Scleroderma.  However, thankfully I march on with help from family and friends!!

This morning while going through my emails I came across an article about Chronic Illnesses.  The article was written by a fellow sufferer of these illnesses.  Mind you, she has Lupus, Sjogrens, & Rheumatoid Arthritis, however, they are all in the same family as my Systemic Sclerosis (Scleroderma).  All of these diseases are debilitating, painful as well as frustrating when one has been an active person.   If you have time, it’s a great read.  You can read it here.

Every point she made is so true.  I was glad to know I’m not the only one feeling this way.  HOWEVER, I must say that I have the BEST set of friends and family.  They don’t judge me for what I can or cannot do.  They are very willing to help me with whatever I need, if I only ask them.

She talks about having to grieve daily over the new daily things she cannot do.  Oh. My. Gosh.  She is so right!!   I know to those that are well, this makes no sense.  But to those of us that suffer, everyday there is a new degree of things that can’t be done.  As I type this, I can see my fingers curving more and more.  I’m not able to spread my hands.  Here’s a test, take a ruler, open your hand and spread out your fingers.  Measure from your thumb to your little finger and note the measurement.  I just did this and I measure 5 1/2 inches.  Weird!!

When my husband holds my hand, if we interlock fingers, his fingers only go to my middle knuckles because the rest are stiff.  Another thing to grieve, not being able to interlock fingers with my hubby.  It’s a sad and scary thing to realize what normal function is gradually slipping away.

She talks about the pain.  Oh yes, the pain.  You know the pain can be a real pain in the a** and it is EXACTLY as she mentions in this article.  What I find frustrating is the FDA in all their infinite wisdom, changed the medication I’m on and limited the amount of pills given at a time.  Not only did they do that, they DO NOT allow refills.  So that means, I have to go to my doctors office each time to get a new script and take it to the pharmacy to be filled.  The ONLY people this hinders are those that have a legitimate reason to be on these medications.  Those that use them to get high, will be able to obtain them some other way.  Can you tell I’m just a tad frustrated?  Oh well, Let It Be as The Beatles sing  OR Let It Go as in Frozen.    Or as her article reads, “Not giving up, but giving up.”  Some would think that is strange, but it really isn’t.  Giving up trying to figure out the whys, what-for, the infinite wisdom of those in charge … etc.  It does make for a better blood pressure reading.

When hubby goes off on something, I just look at him and tell him, I can’t change it.  OR, I don’t have the brain space to deal with that right now.  Which is true!  I now get overwhelmed.  This person who used to be an Escrow Officer handling thousands and millions of dollars now gets overwhelmed and has to stop, breathe and focus my brain and write down what I need to accomplish for that day.  AND not be disappointed that I didn’t get everything on my list checked off.  I spend a lot of time shaking my head at myself.

Her 3 things are very helpful.  I also a fourth thing, which should be my first thing, that is my faith and trust in God.  My fifth thing, which should be my second thing, is my counselor.  Without her, I would not have made it through this year and preparing for this move.

 

 

R.I.P. Lauren Bacall

Another one gone.  She’s lived a long life and such a statuesque lady.  We love watching her movies!  R.I.P. Mz. Bacall.   Bogie and Bacall now together again

I went to Van Gogh and Vino with my friends.  It was so much fun, especially since I have never painted before.  You can check out their website here.  If you have one or something like it near you – GO!!

The night before last, I couldn’t sleep.  I think I had about an hour of sleep that night.  As I lay awake at 3am, I finally took a sleeping pill.  I try not to take one too often as I don’t want my body to get used to it.  Anyway, at 5am, I took a night night pill.  I didn’t wake up until 2pm.  YAY, Praise the Lord I had sleep!!  Last night I slept about 6 hours.  without a pill.  I’ll take it!!  I’ve been up since 5:45am, but that’s okay.  It gave me time to have coffee with my Lord God and work on my devotionals.  It was nice and quiet.   I had quite a bit to journal about, unbeknownst to me!

Not much else going on.  Getting ready to start the ribs for our gathering at a friends house.  It’s so fun to be able to gather.  I hope her hubby isn’t too tired as he gets home today.

Y’all have a great wonder-filled week!!

 

Dog Days of Summer

It’s been pretty hot around here.  Thankful that it cools down when the sun goes down.  I’ve been busy dog sitting.  I had a puppy for a few days.  It reminded me that I don’t want a puppy … EVER!!!  LOL  Oh.  My.  Word.  “No Bite” was my vocabulary for all 3 days.

Then I had a Westi/mini poodle mix.  We fell in love with this little guy.  He was the perfect size and liked to cuddle.  Now I have a Blonde Cocker Spaniel.  As it’s hot outside and we have no a/c – I called his mom to get the name of their groomer.  He’s getting groomed tomorrow.  I hope that helps with his panting in the house.  I feel so bad for him.  He’s also been a joy.

A friend and I went to the park to visit.  On the way back, there’s a cherry tree, with a note that says, for 20 minutes,  pick all you can.  So we were picking cherries and piling them in our shirts.  It was fun and good exercise for my hands.

Can you believe it is already July?  I have to start packing now so I’m ready in 6 months!!

Our neighbors had a yard sale and hubby got me a Schwinn 5 speed cruiser bike for $10.  We just need to get a tube for the front tire and change a couple of cables and I’ll have wheels!!!  LOL   Now to see if I have balance!!  I’m excited and can’t wait to use it.   Hubby was happy as he was able to get a new full set of camping plates/kettle/etc.  along with table top propane heater and a propane lantern.  Big score at this yard sale!!

Since I haven’t been working, my nails have grown long, to the point that I cannot type.  LOL … I guess I had better think about filing them down.

Well, just thought I’d stop in and say hey!  I’m still here and doing good, considering!  Y’all have a safe and Happy Independence Day!!!

Almost Christmas

Christmas is so close.  I know the next couple of days will fly by as we have 5 Christmas Eve services between Monday and Tuesday evening.  Thankfully, we are closed on Christmas AND there are no services next weekend for Volunteer Appreciation Weekend.  It takes many volunteers to put on a service, not to mention an additional 5 Christmas Eve Services.  I’m not sure hubby will know what to do with a weekend off.

I wasn’t going to put up our little tree.  When I walked into the house Friday night, hubby had our little 2 foot tree up.

2013 tree.

He did a great  job.  I guess you can tell what movie I’m watching on the tele – “A Knights Tale”   HAH!

Yesterday, I went with a couple of friends to S4L’s house.  She had a class on Essential Oils.  I’ve  learned quite a bit and look forward to learning more!  Scleroderma has made a mess of my skin (among other things).  After 3 different oils rubbed into my hands and 2 different ones in my water, this morning my skin felt calmer and some of the weird scaly spots are not as bad.  The interesting thing the instructor had mentioned is that most auto-immune diseases are caused by an over abundance of Candida in the body.  What she said made sense and it would definitely be worth checking this out.  As I’m still within the 1st year of this disease, what if this cures it?   I’m all for that!!  I must say that I was exhausted when I got home.  Not sure if it was drinking information from a fire hose or the oils working in my body.  Today, I’m vertical, which is a great thing!

The new medication I started on Friday, can cause facial muscle twitches, seizures and more lovely neurological side effects that I’m not too thrilled about.   Plus another future medication is a mild form of chemo.    I’ll let y’all know the progress as I venture on this new path of Essential Oils

Later today we are going to S4L’s house for a gathering.  It will be fun, as this will be the last time I get to see her and her family before they leave to visit her family in Seattle.  It’s a potluck so I’m going to make Mac & Cheese.  LOL, hopefully it will turn out as I haven’t made it in quite some time.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas!!  Have a great time with you family and friends and hopeful in the perfect gift that was given to us over 2000 years ago!!

Love you all!

 

Happy Thanksgiving

The start of the Holiday Season – Turkey Day!

Usually we go to a casino to eat an then make something on Friday in order to have leftovers for the weekend.  Today, we are going to spend the afternoon with friends and I’m excited.  I may even shave my legs for this!  LOL

Enjoy your family and friends!!  There are many things to be thankful, don’t take those things for granted!!

Dog, Yard & X-rays

We’ve been dog sitting a Cocker Spaniel this past week.  His mom and dad come home sometime on Saturday and they’ll pick him up on Sunday.  I’ve really enjoyed having this dog around.  He is such a good boy and so loving.   Hubby just told the dog that he can’t tell his parents what we let him do.  LOL, yes, we’ve spoiled him.  Hopefully he’ll adjust to being home quickly.

One of our friend’s son needed extra money to get his phone fixed.  We had him over to rake the back yard as neither hubby nor I can do the yard.  It’s difficult with his messed up tendons in his elbow and my ridiculous disease.  He did a great job!!!

I’ve written my speech and now I need to memorize it.  It didn’t turn out like I thought it would, but I think it will be interesting.

I know my hubby tries to be supportive in all that I’m going through, but sometimes things get a little too overwhelming for him.  The other day his anger and frustration about not being able to fix it came out.  I feel bad as neither of us can do anything about it, just wait and see what’s next that the doc has to treat.  I now have to get X-rays on both knees.  It is never a dull moment in my world.

I’ve found a Vegan Blog with yummy sounding desserts, well yeah, it also had food, but I miss desserts!!  I got onto this blog because last night I had Kung Pao Tofu at the Chinese restaurant in town.  It’s now my new favorite thing to order there.  So I was trying to find recipes to make it at home.  I’m really missing  my sweets.

Anyway, thought I’d stop in and hear myself talk!  Y’all have a great weekend!!!

 

 

No title, just thoughts

I don’t remember if I mentioned that I joined Toastmasters in my area.  I’ve been enjoying the time and the people.  October 2nd, I do my first speech, which is an ice breaker speech.  In other words, I get to talk about me … all about me!  LOL, after doing this blog for many years, one would think that I wouldn’t have a problem with that.

How much do I reveal or how little?  The speech is about 5-7 minutes.  How do I talk about me for 5-7 minutes.  LOL … I’m sure I’ll come up with something.

Do you ever feel like you’re losing the cushion in your knees?  That’s what is new with me.  We are dog watching a cocker spaniel for a week.  I took him for a walk last night and had to stop and sit a couple of times at the park.  I’m glad he is an older dog, so he wasn’t pulling, but he still wanted to go faster than I.  As I write this, he’s laying on the floor wanting to go for another walk, but it is windy and cold outside, I don’t think we’ll be going anywhere, except outside in the back yard.

I think dog sitting is the way to get my doggy fix!  We get to love on them for the time we have them and return them when their owners come back.  So far this is our second time dog sitting, of a different dog.  In October we get to watch a mastiff who is a gentle giant.  I’m really looking forward to that as I have always loved big dogs.  In November, we may be watching another, during Thanksgiving.    It is pretty interesting how attached I get to these dogs.  Then again, it is also interesting how I can let them go when their owners return.

I’m hoping we will have a Fall, longer than normal.  I am ready for the cool weather, but not ready for extreme cold.  I’m not sure how my disease will like being cold.  So this will be a new experience for me.

I’ve had 2 weeks of busy and I’m pretty worn out.  My plan is to do as little as possible.  I hope you all have a great weekend!!